Feeling a Little down, but then I saw this.

Today has just been one of those days where I’ve felt like crap and I can’t figure out why.  I’m really not experiencing too much shoulder pain.  It’s not cold outside.  Etc. etc.

Well, someone posted this on Facebook and I just busted up laughing out loud when I read the caption at the bottom.  That is of course after I looked intently at the photo.

Check it out.  Read the whole comment at the bottom.

 

It’s Been a Rough Time

I definitely won’t look back nostalgically on this year.  It’s been difficult physically and psychologically.  While I do seem to be coming through the physical issues, I am still dealing with some mental anguish. Hell, damn near any stupid television show or movie can make me think about something that upsets me.

The simple truth is I really need to reassess my life and just move on.  Stop wallowing in my self pity and get going with just the process of living a good life.  I used to, but lately I’ve let myself descend into an almost perpetual state of quasi-depression.

I need to get out there and mix it up with people like I used to.  I shouldn’t be watching life as it passes me by, I should be living it to the fullest once again.  No, my life hasn’t exactly turned out like I wanted it to, but then again most people don’t end up in the exact destination which they had initially intended.  Although, admittedly most don’t get derailed by a life altering incident, but that was 16 years ago.  It wasn’t that long ago that I was nothing but enthusiastic about everything.

Well, I’m going to start blogging once again.  That’s something I always enjoyed doing and unfortunately I let the collapse of Windows light spaces and the ascent of Facebook squash that enthusiastic endeavor.  I just can’t bare my soul on Facebook.  

I don’t know when the new thing became micro-blogging, but I definitely don’t like it.  Sure, it’s fun to catch up with some old friends, but in all honesty once you chat a couple of times there isn’t much more to catch up on.

I think tomorrow I’m going to go to the movie.  Forget about whatever else I had planned.  I can do it next week.  I need to stop worrying about not getting enough accomplished and think more about just having a good time.

Shutting down Shortly

I am planning on shutting down this blog once WLS ceases to exist.  So, I would appreciate it if you would visit me at my other blog  for updates and random entries.
Billy Paul

Finally some good news

Lately there just hasn’t been hardly any good news regarding my mother.  I just haven’t been the emblem of optimism lately and therefore have avoided writing about too much of anything.  Today, however, my mother saw her doctor and I finally have something good about which I can write.  The tumors in her liver have substantially shrank and the ones in her lungs have also atrophied, albeit not at the same rate as the liver tumors. 

When I saw my mother on Wednesday she looked considerably better than she has over the past two months.  We think a lot of her improvement was due to the fact that she wasn’t able to do chemo last weekend, when she was normally scheduled, because the platelets in her blood were way too low.  She had to have a transfusion and a couple of days later she seemed to sound and look much better.  In fact, she looked better on Wednesday that she has over the last couple of months.  She is starting chemo again Monday, but at least now we have some empirical proof that she is doing better, despite some of the setbacks.

I can tell I haven’t written hardly anything lately.  I started off with a big long entry and ended up winnowing it down to the two paragraphs above.  I decided to strip out all the unnecessary news and just give you the good stuff.
I hope you’re one else will have a wonderful weekend.  I know I plan on it.
BP
PS it seems that my microphone troubles have returned.  I may need to look at purchasing a new sound card, so I ask for your forbearance.

Need Some Advice

Since I’m new to WordPress, I thought I would reach out and ask for some advice.  I have been wanting to start a new blog where those who are around me all the time don’t have access to it or at least have to search endlessly to find it.  Some might say why do I need such a site?  Well, the answer is I need somewhere to be able to write about things that are bothering me, things I observe, and anything else on my mind and not worry about whether I’m going to upset those around me.  Not that I want to be rude, obnoxious or disparaging, but I do need a place to vent.  My brother and sister-in-law use Facebook and even though I know they’re writing about their job sometimes — taking care of me — I choose to leave their Facebook page entirely to themselves and their friends.  They need to have somewhere to let loose.

My gosh I wrote a whole paragraph and didn’t actually ask my question.  Typical me, always verbose and never straight to the point.  What I am wanting to know is if I create another page using this username and password will it be easy for people who know about my Windows live spaces page to find my new blog?

I appreciate any advice.

Does anyone know how to make the text larger?  Some people don’t have the great vision which I am lucky enough to still possess.  At least my reading vision.

Oh yeah, if you notice any really bad comments, please let me know.  I am allowing all comments right now until I have a little more time to monitor them.
BP

I hope to see you around shortly.

I know I really haven’t been around much lately, but it seems like there hasn’t been nearly as much going on as there used to be in space. Now I’m learning that spaces is merging with WordPress. How interesting. I had already considered going over to WordPress and in fact I think I have a WordPress account quite some time ago. After tonight on going to be on WordPress, but hopefully you’ll be able to get me at Spaces still. If not, I’ll come by and let you know.

Lately I have been concentrating on getting my cell phone up and running. That in itself has demanded quite a bit of time. Unfortunately I’m having to special order everything on the Internet and now I’m wondering why I even started in the first place. I was lucky that the VA authorized me to get a No Buttons Bluetooth which will now allow me to use any cell phone that has voice capability. So, all I had to do was use this Bluetooth with my old service. Well, I may do that eventually because my current rate is around $40 a month. Then again I could tag onto my brother’s cell phone account and just pay him the extra money it will cost him. I don’t spend a lot of time on the cell phone, nor do I receive or send text messages, for obvious reasons. I don’t want to go into depth about all the cell phone features that I am trying to get, but I’ll let you know if I do get everything up and running.

There’s also been a lot of things going on around my house. I had a standby generator installed today and all I have to do is get the natural gas hooked up and I will be able to have the electrician test it out so I won’t have to worry when the electricity goes out next time. Then my house will be 98% protected. That’s 1% for the front door (in all honesty it’s probably more than that) and 1% for some minor enhancements I could still do in the attic. The things we have to do to live in Florida.

I hope everyone is doing well. I’m going to try to go around and comment on everyone’s latest entry, but I’m using Windows Live Spaces homepage, so if you haven’t been active, like me, then I might not get around to your site for a few days.

Take care everyone,

BP

PS my mother’s doing better this week. It’s been a week since she underwent chemo and she does seem to do better a week out. So I guess I’ll try to get down to see her in the next day or two.

Some of My Most Cherished Memories

I got a call from the Frau yesterday and it seems that she had a visitor from Australia.  He was there to see his girlfriend, my German niece, as well as look at Germany for the first time.  I knew they would probably go, but I didn’t realize how bad I really missed this particular activity until I heard her describing the weekend they spent in the Eng.

 

The link should have opened into another window, but for some reason that features not working right now.

This is one unbelievable area.  It’s a real enclave that is only accessible by one road and even though it has been commercialized somewhat, it is still one of the most ideally beautiful places I have ever been able to go hiking, while still being able to enjoy good food and great accommodations.  I only wish I had thought to go into this area to do some mountain bike riding back when I was able to.  Anyway, here is a site where you can look at some pictures and I think you’ll understand why I am so enamored with this particular little heaven.

As for any other news, I don’t have too much.  I’m still having some difficulty setting up my new cell phone so that I’m able to operate it with just my voice.  I may have purchased some unnecessary parts, or something else might be going wrong.  All I know is it’s really frustrating having to pay for a cell phone that I activated, but really isn’t effectively doing me any good right now.  I sent an e-mail to another quadriplegic, who also happened to be the person who recommended this phone to me, to see if she can help me figure out what that I’m doing wrong.  I just finished writing a paragraph and after I was done I thought to myself, "self, you can barely understand that, how are they going to understand what the heck you’re saying?"

Well, I encourage you to take a look at the photos of the valley I mentioned above.  It’s a wonderful landscape.  In my mouth is watering just thinking of the food I used to eat down there.  I really can’t wait for the Frau the show appears so I can gain a few pounds.
Take care and have a wonderful week.
BP

Back in the Saddle Again

I was able to get up on Saturday for about six hours so that I could attend the opening game of the University of South Florida football season.  Since I wasn’t entirely sure everything was hunky-dory, I decided to stay down on Sunday and then got up on Labor Day to visit my mother, who I hadn’t seen in a couple of weeks.  Everything went well and she looked considerably better than the last time I visited her.  Although if you were to listen to her, she’s on death’s door as I dictate this.  She was actually able to walk into the Florida room without the aid of her walker and although it scared the hell out of me, it delighted me in another way.

It took nine days to heal the two small spots and now I have to get used to my chair again.  Oh I delight in things like this.  I did, however, learn some viable lessons about what to use it you have a slight open area in a position that could potentially turn into a decubitus ulcer.  I did some research and asked a lot of other quads and I ultimately ended up purchasing bag balm.  Literally 12 hours after we started using it we could see a considerable change.  Thanks for the go better and I started to feel like I had control again.

I would have been on the web a little bit more while I was in bed, but for some reason I was having difficulties with all the other microphones, not to mention the pain in the butt of having to wear my glasses.  I really need to get some old-fashioned half-moon reading glasses that are extremely comfortable.  That or I need to go in for LASIK surgery.

Hopefully I’ll be able to start getting more accomplished so I feel a little bit more self worth.  I know it’s difficult for most people to comprehend, but even someone as optimistic as I am has times when I don’t feel as if I’m contributing enough.  In some ways that’s a good thing, but in others it can be somewhat self-destructive.

I’ll try to get around to looking at all of your blogs tonight, but I’m going to be driving around my neighborhood for the first time in about six weeks, so who knows whether this microphone will stay in sync if I happen to stop and talk to a neighbor or two.  My gosh is my voice rather raspy today.  I sound like a 70-year-old smoker.

Until later.
BP

Stuck

Things really haven’t been going my way lately.  My mother continues to suffer and hasn’t really improved much at all lately.  This has me quite upset, but if that weren’t enough I have developed a problem that now has me bed down for quite a while.  I have been in bed since Thursday night and even though I might have to go in tomorrow and get looked at, there is probably no chance of me getting up for at least a week.

I developed some raw areas in my groin area and these are in such a place that if I sit in my wheelchair I am likely to turn them into a full-fledged ulcer.  I am, therefore, being overly cautious.  I’ve had some trouble with my computer in my bedroom and this is why I haven’t been on the web again lately.  I have managed to get the computer working effectively if I wear my glasses, but my eyes have seriously gotten much worse.  I just hate wearing glasses when I am in bed.  The pain of growing older.

Anyway, I will try to be around at least a few times in the next week.  I hope everyone’s okay and I’m really hoping that this site starts to become more active once again.
BP

Another Update

I haven’t forgotten about you all, I just haven’t had the lust to write about much of anything lately.  I did get a chance to see my mother yesterday and even though she is considerably better than last time I visited with her, she is extraordinarily weak and a little pessimistic about this entire outcome.  She just finished up her second round of chemotherapy, albeit a weaker dose of chemotherapy than her previous one.  So far she doesn’t seem to be reacting too badly, except for the extraordinary fatigue.  Her inability to walk very well is still one of the most prevalent issues.  Thankfully I had a shower/toilet chair sitting in my garage which I was able to give her.  Almost every time I see her she tells me how much of a life saver that thing has been.  We will keep praying and keeping everyone updated.

I really wanted to write about more, but my abdominal binder, which helps hold my diaphragm in tight and facilitates my ability to breathe real well, not to mention raises my blood pressure so I can function decently, just isn’t positioned correctly and I am having difficulty dictating effectively.  So, I’m going to call it quits on the computer tonight with plans of being here tomorrow.

Take care and I can’t wait to see what’s going on in all of your lives.
BP